0:00:01
Okay. We are live. Hello. Welcome to Nourish the Risktakers. I am so excited for today’s episode. Of course, just a reminder if you’re watching this live. Please do share your comments. We will look at them and and see them in real time. If you’re watching this on the replay on social media, please do just let us know by hitting replay below. And of course, we take this afterwards and create an audio, so you can always listen to it on anywhere where you listen to podcasts and of course on YouTube.

0:00:31
Now, I am so excited about this week’s nourish the risk takers podcast because Karina and I have been in a in a relationship and I know that sounds really Yeah. Everyone’s going, oh, our relationship. We’ve been in an interesting, I would say, collaboration, co-creation space over the last two or three months especially. And it’s been a really I would say an intimate connection that we’ve had. And that you brought an idea to me and I was like, yeah, let’s make it happen. Yeah. But we’re gonna talk a little bit more about that. But for right now, Karina, welcome to nourish the risk takers. Do you wanna introduce yourself and just tell us a little bit about you? Sure. Hi. Hi. Thanks for having me on Marissa. I’m really excited to be here.

0:01:20
My name is Karina Blackheart. I am the founder of KBH Enterprises, which is just everything that I do under that umbrella. But right now, my big baby that I’m working on and trying to grow and develop and water and nourish is the Crone herself dot com. Where I discuss big prone energy, teach women who are my age and way younger than me, how to access this energy for the betterment of our lives so that our whole lives get bigger that we take better responsibility for ourselves, our power, and the collective. So I’m a a whole life priestess, whole life evolutionary priestess, really interested in working with women to take our power and destroy, burn, demolish the good girl book of rules. That don’t make any sense. Yeah. So let’s let’s dive in there because of course this podcast is about nourishing the risk takers.

0:02:30
And I definitely have seen, you know, I when somebody says, well, what’s a risk taker? And I said, you know, you know, originally, I I saw the business owners were expected to take on a lot of risk, a lot of responsibility just because they have the audacity to come up with an idea. And I could see a lot of people going, well, if you didn’t know that that was gonna happen, you shouldn’t have become a business owner. Meanwhile, this was always said by people who don’t have the guts or function to actually become a business owner themselves. That’ll never work. That’ll never work. That look great. And it’s like, if you tried it, no, then why are you even talking to me right now? Like, it’s just, like, one of those things.

0:03:08
And so I started thinking about nurse the risk takers about how we can reach out people who are traditionally expected to do the labor, to do the work. And if they have any kind of, like, hey, can we do this easier? Can I get help? Can I get support? It was like, why can’t you hack it or why can’t you handle it? And I love that you work with women who because let’s just face it.

0:03:35
A lot of labor is expected of women and fem folks to to just do it. And to not ask for help. And if you were asked for help, you know, there’s we we can do this as a gender examination, and I do hope that people do participate in this. Because, of course, men have their own set of expectations as well. But we can look at, you know, women and the the folks who are women adjacent, you know, we definitely are seeing that they’re not allowed to ask for help. They’re not allowed because it seems like why can’t you handle it? Why can’t you do it all? Or you’re just supposed to already know. Right? You’re just supposed to magically know I was just getting ready for my own podcast and one of the I’ve been soliciting questions from my audience.

0:04:25
And one of the questions was, like, I’m sandwiched between caring for aging, ailing parents, and teenagers. And I’m in perimenopause. How do I do this gracefully? And I was like, great. What’s grace? What is first of all? Let’s look up the word grace. And figure out what that means and what does that mean to you and who told you you had to be graceful — Yeah. — in every moment and Nobody gave us the manual of how to do this. Right? If you don’t have elders we don’t ask our elders. Right? Or the elders aren’t forthcoming or or they’re still saying you should already know You should just know. Mhmm. And yeah. I just looked up the definition of grace. But I just looked up the definition of grace.

0:05:19
And it’s like courteous goodwill. So I love this actually because we gotta give ourselves some courteous goodwill in in managing all of these rules that we’re taking on. Yes. Yeah. And and that are thrust upon us. Right? I mean, we know some day our parents are gonna get old and they’re gonna need us. And we know some day we’re gonna have teenagers and they’re gonna need us differently from moment to moment to moment to moment. Despite them saying that they don’t need us. Yeah. They do. Despite them saying, get away from me. Just leave me alone. Yeah. And our bodies need us. And, you know, our mind needs us So, like, we’re present in so many different positions. Right.

0:06:05
What I said to this woman was, this is an obstacle course. And the only way that you learn to run an obstacle course is you learn to run it. You practice it and you practice it and you practice it and you practice And we have no practice for this obstacle course. Right. We’re just supposed to step into the rule. No matter whether it’s in our life or raising children or facing menopause or getting older or taking care of our aging parents or running a business. Mhmm. You know, the only way you get to know what the steps are in the and you can foresee obstacles is if you’ve run that course a bunch of times. Mhmm. Yeah. And that’s where you come in. Right? Because you’ve run the course so many times. Right? Like, you can foresee oh, you need to do this next. You need to do next No. Don’t do that. Don’t spend your time doing that. Right?

0:07:05
And it’s so wonderful to have a business mentor who is experienced. Yeah. Well, and also, like, disaster would help Now Yeah. Yeah. I’m a disaster prep person too. So, like, I started off in crisis communications. And so, I’m the person who, like, literally thought of all of the worst case scenarios that could happen in anything any situation.

0:07:31
I worked in a variety of different industries. And so I bring that because I think it I don’t wanna, like, bring anybody’s vibe down, you know, like, the whole, like, good vibes only crap that we hear out there. But it’s like being prepared. Right? Being prepared because at any given time, when we are working with people who are disabled or who have neurodivergence or any of the other plethora of marginalizations and impressions that at any given time are placed upon our bodies. We have to plan to navigate everything. And when we’re running a business and that’s our only income source, we don’t have the luxury to just put things on the shelf. Like, oh, I’ll I’ll work my business later. While I handle this flare up, while I handle, you know, my aging parent needing care. I’ll just do it later. That doesn’t work like that.

0:08:19
My father passed away suddenly and I remember thinking, like, thank god, I work a bit because I didn’t have to worry about bereavement time. I flew out the next day. I was able to help my stepmother, you know, be there and be with the family. And but I still work. Like, I remember one of my clients was like, what’s the background happening? I’m like, I’m in a hotel room. I made decision to get a hotel room instead of staying with my family because I knew I’d have to work.

0:08:45
And, you know, she’s like, oh, we could reschedule and, like, actually, I can’t because it’s not like I just get to just put everything the next week because in the next week I have all the other appointments, you know. So sometimes I have to in the middle of a funeral planning go and help a client for an hour. I don’t have the luxury of just shelving that. Right? Right? You know? And there’s people out there who will say, you can schedule your business to a lap no. It’s bull it’s bull crap. Right. It’s bullcrap. Yeah. It doesn’t happen that way. Yeah. I I I love that, but you work from home, so you’re available all the time. Or if you had your systems and your automations or you just had an online course, we wouldn’t have to show up. And it’s like, how do you think those things get sold? Doesn’t matter if I’m working with a client or I’m doing a marketing plan. All of that is still there. It’s just inter it’s interesting the commentary we get. Right? So let’s talk about the crone herself. Okay. What is at the core of the crone herself?

0:09:45
Like, why did you start this idea? Because I was very excited when you brought it up. You know, I was struggling with my other businesses. Right? Things weren’t feeling exactly right and that I wasn’t being nourished in the ways that I need to be nourished. One of my businesses I’ve been doing I’ve been teaching in that venue for about twenty years.

0:10:14
And making a decision to leave that was hard. There was grief involved. There was am I doing the right thing? What am I gonna do next? And as I started to move away from that and build what I was doing next, everything just kept falling apart. Right? The website was just we’re not even gonna go there, but it was three months of horrible experiences trying to build a new website and trying to come up with content and everything that I needed to do to build this business just felt like And you remember me being in the rooms and being like, I don’t wanna do that. I’m gonna yeah. I don’t wanna do it. Why do I have to do all this busy work? I just wanna do what I’m here to do. And that’s still true. I still wanna do what I’m here to do. It that wasn’t the right venue for me, and but I hadn’t I didn’t know what was next. So I was really in this place of, like, I’m building this thing. It’s not making me happy. What am I doing? And I don’t know.

0:11:24
I stumbled on this website and it said something like, you’ve never been comfortable calling yourself a coach because you’re not when you’re a priestess. And I had just sort of sit back and take a really deep breath because that’s true. Right? I’ve been a priestess for thirty five years. And I’ve called myself all kinds of things, right, to avoid the p word. Right? So I would be acceptable, right, to a wider audience. Right? So I’ve called myself a coach. I’ve been a mentor. I’ve been a empowerment person. I’ve been, you know, a a teacher or all of these titles. And I said, but you know, priestess just sounds like somebody who’s in their twenties. Right? Or and you get you we see all the images, right, of priestesses, and they’re they’re size four and they’re wearing their prom gown in the woods and Gallavanting, and I’m like, look at me, that’s not what I look like. I’ve never looked like that.

0:12:34
But I was having this other thing happen in my life where I’m postmenopausal now. Right? Like my hormones, Oh my god. My hormones are just the same. Every PM day. I am the same person this afternoon as I was the morning and as I will be tomorrow and next week. And it’s like a revelation. Right, to not be week to week to week to week, day to day to day during perimenopause and menopause, like, who am I? What is happening? Could I even trust myself to make a decision? And there’s really been this thing like my kids are Mostly grown. Right? They’re twenty two and twenty six. They the twenty two year old still lives here and needs parenting from me at a level that I’m kind of uncomfortable with. Right? I’m right. I don’t really want a parent at that level anymore.

0:13:38
But there’s a sense of You’re like, I got things to do. I got a life to live now. Like, you’re supposed to be gone. Right? Oh, man. This is their neurodivergent, you know, to — Yeah. — an extreme. They’re never probably gonna be gone. Right? We’ll probably always live together. And then they can be writing to someone saying, how do I take care of my gouty, old mother? Right? When the total path is? Yeah. So all of these things were sort of converging. Right?

0:14:09
And this sense of really I think when I met you and I started working in the catalyst and you would ask me questions, and they, a lot of times, if it was about my business, I would hesitate. But if it was about me and the kind of work I do, I was so solid and I shocked myself at how solid I was. And I so there was this on the one hand, my business was like, what is happening? But I felt so solid. And so when this question came up about what kind of priestess are you, which is question I give my students all the time. What kind of which are you? What kind of are you? What kind of magical practitioner are you? And it was time for me to ask myself that question again. And the answer was, I’m a Crone now. I’m fifty eight years old. And I said, what does that look like? In relationship to what I want to be teaching, how I want to be leading, how I want to be nourishing women who are my age and older and my age and younger. Right? This is a whole life spectrum event, this Big Crone Energy.

0:15:31
And I sat with my morning pages, which I write every morning, write handwritten, sit down, stream of consciousness. A lot of times, it’s just to do less. But twenty six pages poured out of me. And it was like a whole it was this huge thing. Right? And I I said I had a business plan. Yeah. And then an idea for a business plan. Yeah. And I’ll never forget that day.

0:16:00
You were like, can we can we just go into, like, a private room? And I was like, come into my office. We have a virtual world a catalyst. Yeah. So we went into my favorite room, which is just, like, a lush green wall of, like and, like, kinda, nineteen sixty seven aesthetic is my jam. Little low coffee table. Yeah. That we’re on a comfy couch and, you know, like, with the sun streaming in, it’s a virtual world everyone. Just we can make it whatever we want. Yeah.

0:16:27
So you said I have this idea and you started showing me some of the phrases that came out of that twenty six page document. And, of course, we all know the the one that really hit me. Of course, which is meet your whole life. And I was like, my whole life, Karina, and when I said that though, you had a, like, a reaction. You were, like, oh, no. Like Well, you were talking I was using that language in the previous programs that I was trying to develop.

0:17:02
Yeah. And the way I heard it was that it was filled with trepidation and anxiety and, like, sure, that is too much. Oh, right. No. And, you know, like I’m thinking, oh, I need to narrow my focus. Maybe I shouldn’t use that language because I don’t wanna scare people thinking, we’re gonna rearrange your whole life. No. I was gonna meet my whole life.

0:17:29
And when you start talking about the Crone herself of, like, really stepping into that energy and being able to embrace my whole life, all the roles, all the expectations, all of but meeting it with my energy like, the meeting it with my whole self And we’ve talked a lot about this because you and I both agree, like, that whole rhetoric around I’m gonna I I even, like, squinted my eyes just thinking about the whole rhetoric where we’re broken or we’re not whole. Like, you and I both are right on that same page. As soon as I have a client that says, I’m broken. I’m not whole. I’m like, we’re gonna like, we’re not doing that here. We are whole people. But being able to really embrace and step in and claim that energy. Claim that big prone energy. Yeah. So that I can meet my whole life.

0:18:18
To me was about being just intentional about me enjoying the time I have here even when things suck. Even when I’m, like, struggling or when I’m when I’m stepping into a big opportunity — Right. — it is stepping into my whole life with that big crone energy. Yes. That’s nourishment. That’s self nourishment because it’s giving myself that permission to be that person. And that’s what it is. Right? It’s permission. It says, It doesn’t matter what the good girl book, rulebook says.

0:18:55
What feels good? What nourishes me? What depletes me and saying yes to nourishing ourselves. If we don’t do that, guess what? You can’t take care of those teenagers. You can’t take care of those elderly parents, you can’t take care of and you won’t take care of your whatever’s going on in your body because you’re not even giving yourself enough time to know what’s happening and what your options are, how you wanna handle that. You know? So this On the one hand, you know, I frame it in this way of, like, get rid of the good girl rulebook.

0:19:40
Because we’re already good. We’re already good. You’re gonna make me cry. Scruggs. Don’t cry. I’m sorry. Make you cry again. Appens? Yeah. You know, we’re already good. We already have permission. There’s nothing wrong with us. We may have things that need treatment. We may have healing work that we need to do. Right? We may have skill sets that we have yet to grasp.

0:20:13
But none of that means that we’re broken or that we’re deficient where something is wrong inherently wrong with us. I feel like so many women I work with come to me with this and reveal this deep, dark secret that they they know that there is something inherently wrong with them. And it’s like this moment that it just breaks my heart over and over and over and over again because there’s nothing wrong with us. We came into this life innocent And we’re still innocent. If you don’t feel innocent about something, make amends. Make it right. So that you feel okay, but it doesn’t mean that there’s something that you’re broken. Mhmm. Yeah. And, I mean, when we I think when we let go of that whole, like, idea that we could be broken, It’s really it’s just it’s enriching. It’s just like it’s like, okay.

0:21:20
I sent you a video this morning of a lady dancing had a sort of cliff con concert, and she’s the security guard. Yeah. The person who’s, like, in charge of making sure people don’t rush the stage, and she was in her moment. Right? She she was dancing, singing, and, like, not just, like, like, you know, this kind of dancing. She had moved. She had choreography. She did in there. And she was, like, making eye cont so the thing is what was really, like, what I would notice, and because I used to work in a large stadium and a symphony orchestra. So security, I’m like, she was still making eye contact with everybody, letting people know that there was gonna be no rushing the stage today on her watch. And to make sure that everybody was safe while she had a really great time.

0:22:05
And I was like, this is it. She’s having a really great time She’s enjoying her life. She’s enjoying her moment while she is still doing her job, keeping her role, and making sure that everyone knew that she was the main character. You’re here to see Taylor Swift, but right now you’re in my aisle and we are going to be here together and we are going to be doing this together. Yep. But also if any one of you think you’re even going to step out of your seat, we are going to have a situation. And I was like, This is BCE. This is big crone energy — Yeah. — because she was taking care of herself, she was taking care of everybody around her in her role, and she was having fun doing She was having a blast. Yeah. Yeah. And the people around her, you could see the ones who were giving her attention. We’re having a blast watching her as well. Manage all of that. Right? Yeah.

0:22:58
There’s one gallon like a sparkly dress and she you could see she was like, oh, shoot. I don’t know how to dance. This lady has like rhythm. I gotta she she, like, fixed her she was like, oh, okay. Yeah. I’m having more fun now that I’m letting myself actually as opposed to the kind weird swing. She started. Yeah. She started getting into it. And it was like a little ripple effect out. People were having more fun because this lady was showing up and having fun. Right. Right. And she didn’t have to wear a sparkly dress. No. And she didn’t have to do all of the things. She’s in her security guard uniform — Yeah. — having a blast. Yeah. And something about her age as well. She’s allowed to have a blast because she’s not trying to look a certain way. Yeah.

0:23:49
And I think this is such an important piece of the Crone herself as well. There’s this moment where you realize You walk into a room and no one is looking at you because you’ve reached a certain age. You are no longer someone who as people scan the room for who’s there, they’re not scanning you. They’re going right by you. And as a in in my experience, right, people always stop to scan. Right? And so there was this moment when I realized, oh, that’s not happening.

0:24:36
And I know women who get really upset by that. Right? They they they rely upon that male gaze. Right? Or the gaze women check women out all the time to make sure that we’re doing the right thing. Now we look okay.

0:24:54
And to be dismissed feels like a loss of some kind. For me, it felt like such a relief Like, seriously no one cares, would I look like? Because I hit a certain age. Thank god. I’m finally free. Right? I can look however I want. I can show up however I want. And no one is gonna say and even if they do, I don’t care anymore. Right? Oh, well, she should be taking better care of her self or she should wear more makeup or she should dye her hair or whatever. It doesn’t matter because nobody’s really paying attention. Yeah.

0:25:37
I embrace that quite a few years ago. Maybe my whole life. I don’t know. But particularly when I stopped wearing pants, and embrace just wearing a dress mostly because I don’t have to think about what my top and bottom is. I just know exact I spent on dress and I’m done on a black sweater. But I have people all the time when I’m out in public. They’ll be like, oh, your skirt is tucked up. Like, some I have a big, big old butt. And so sometimes the skirt just, like, rest sleep. So Yeah. And I was like, okay. And then they’re like, oh, you you don’t care.

0:26:09
We were at a restaurant once, and I wasn’t wearing, like, leggings or anything, but was like this amazing buffet. And I was like, I’ll come back and I’m like, I got this little, like, my plate and the lady beside was like, oh, man, your skirt’s tacked up. I’m like, why are you watching? And she was like, what? I’m like, is your dinner not good enough? Eyes on your plate, man. Eyes on your plate. And she was just like, oh, I’m like, yeah, because you weren’t doing it to help me. You were doing it to, like, point out something that you didn’t like. And I’m like, it’s different when it’s, like, hey, oh, hey, you’ve got, like, a piece of toilet paper stuff here. That’s a good one.

0:26:41
But, like, trying to, like, monitor my clothing. Got no time for that. And my husband you know, she looked at, like, my husband. Her husband was like, yeah. She has a butt and sometimes her skirt falls. Like, It’s not a big deal. Yeah. She’s still looking at her at your husband. Like, you’re gonna back me up here and help me police your woman. No. And he was just like, sometimes it happens, eyes on your plate. Like, you know, and, like, it was weird. It was a weird situation. But I’m just like, I got nothing. Like, sometimes that’s gonna happen. If I feel a draft, I’ll pull it down, but I’m not really worried about it. Like, because I got my own thing to do. I got my I got my own plate of tasty food. You know, and I’m not gonna worry about pulling down my skirt while I’m juggling, you know, a massive plate of tasty food. It’s not gonna happen.

0:27:26
But this policing — Yeah. — of one another — that’s in the good girl book. Yeah. Right? Like, when we get that indoctrination, part of the privilege that we receive with it, I’m speaking as a white woman. K? Excuse me, is the is the privilege or the responsibility, right, to police other women? To say when when you’re laughing too loud or when your dress is hiked up or your dress is too short or your hair is too long or your whatever. Right? And it’s supposed to be helpful. And it’s not. It is just a reinforcement of you’re always being observed to make sure that you are staying in line. And I don’t wanna go too far into this because if I go too far, then I I make a mistake. But I wanna say, that this is part of what is going on between white women and women of color. That we think that we’re being helpful by policing all of all women. We do it to each other. But it’s a that we’re in different cultures. Right? We’ve been inculturated slightly differently. Yeah.

0:28:49
So my policing of your business? First of all, we need to just stop across the board. This is an interesting kind of thing that distinction that we haven’t talked about yet on the podcast. And it’s a difference between, you know, looking out for each other and policing. It’s nourishing and restricting people. Right.

0:29:10
Because everyone will say, well, I just want I was just trying to be nice. I was just trying to help you out. And it’s that tone. Right? As soon as someone says that tone, you’re so glad. Yeah. Yeah. You know exactly what you were trying to do — Yeah. — as soon as you become defensive. Yeah. Right? You know, the lady who was, like, your skirts tucked out, like, yeah, I don’t care. And, you know, she could be like, okay. Cool. Like, that would have been her response, but she was like offended that I didn’t care. And it was an intro as soon as, like, She’s like, I’m just trying to be helpful. I’m like, no, you’re not. But thank you. You know? And it’s just like, I can tell. I could I can actually tell. Yeah. And that’s it.

0:29:47
If you become defense if someone says no thank you to your idea of helping or supporting or nourishing, monitor your own response. You know, show exactly, like, if you’re feeling like defense or like that person should be thankful. Pack it up, go off somewhere else. You don’t need to unpack it in front of them either. That’s not their responsibility because that is that’s nurturing and nourishing other people. Is unpacking your own ish elsewhere? Yes. Yes.

0:30:23
And we’re unpacking, really, unlearning thousands of years of evolution. Thousands of years of conditioning and real impressions that are all in they’re in conflict with each other. Right? When we start listing all the ways that we’re supposed to look and behave and act and be graceful and be thankful and be responsible. They’re in conflict with one another. Right? So it’s like if you’ve got a bad program running on your system, The whole system is you have to start from scratch. Yeah. So in unlearning thousands of years of this kind of conditioning. Mhmm.

0:31:18
Our job is to say what makes me happy. Mhmm. What makes me feel good What what what foods upset me? Right? If I don’t get this much sleep. What am I like the next day? If I drink that much coffee, I mean, these simple tiny little places that we begin with. These little questions. But when we start to pull that thread, yeah, all kinds of things unravel, and we get to use that thread to knit together what we do love, what we do want, and we learn to ask other people, what is it that you want? Yeah. So that I can nurse you the way that you long to be nourished. Yeah. Or maybe find joy in it too. Yeah. Right? Like, you’re, you know, you’re thinking, oh, this person shouldn’t be doing this. It’s like, well, why don’t you just put yourself in their shoes for half a minute? You might have fun doing that too. Yep. Yep.

0:32:24
There was something about when I came to the catalyst and I realized, like, oh, I am, like, a little in over my head. Right? But I’m smart. I can keep up. Yeah. And Oh my god. I am finally in the right place with people who actually know the answers to the things I’m asking. Yeah. And who aren’t doing this as a hobby. Yeah. Yeah.

0:32:55
That’s the big thing. We gotta pay bills. With what we have to we have to make sure that where we’re going for help is the right place, and we’re gonna actually get the help that we need — Yeah. — to make a place. Yeah. And part of it is, like, the wrong people. I can’t ask you know, my neighbor across the street if he can put the fire out in my house. Right? He’s not a firefighter. Bunk out of the shed. No. Again. And these are people who say that this is what they do for a living. But — Right. — just kind of mhmm. Right. Yeah. But you can also go, like, for example, like like you said, this is a guy who who, like, an external mariner. I got this. We’re gonna oh, there’s no skunk. It’s a possum. And you’re like, I can I can smell that there is definitely a skunk? So you same thing with, like, coaching or business support because I’ve been through it all.

0:33:50
People will will say that they are they know the answer and they might know one part of the answer. But part of it too, what I have found in this space, is that we might not be ready to hear the answer as well. Okay? And that we might ask the question or we might ask for help. Yep. But we actually aren’t ready to really be like, receive that help.

0:34:16
And it can be it can be a challenge and I I recognize it is, but I also I have so much patience for people. Like, I’m just like, whenever you’re ready. I I don’t say it twelve hundred times sometimes. And I know other people in the room are that too. Like, they’re just like, we’ve got really great people in our community that they’re just like, I might have said this six hundred times, but the person it wasn’t it was Thursday. And Thursday, we don’t need to hear things on Thursday, but maybe Friday. And that’s okay too.

0:34:44
But I’ve I’ve really noticed that it it is a special space where you can maybe show up and be not quite ready as well. But if you keep showing up and you keep working on it, all of a sudden, the thing that you might have heard twelve hundred times, you actually understand the thing you’re hearing because that’s a different thing. Right? I can hear the words — Yes. — but does the word mean anything to me? Yes. Like learning a new language. Right? I can hear that same word five hundred times. And then you also don’t realize you’re out in public and you use that word instead of the word that you may, like, the the regular language that you’re always and you’re like, here’s a word and I’ve used it and how it makes sense to me, you know. Yeah.

0:35:25
Same thing with learning a new skill or a new or doing something in your business where you’re growing. Yeah. And you I’ve seen you do it. I’ve seen you come in and be like, today is not the day. And then you come in and then you’re like, goodbye. We’ll see you later. And then you come in and then you’re like, today is the day. I’m I’m learning this today. And I love that. I love watching you do that. Yeah. Now I have a habit of, like, you if you present me with something new that I’m uncomfortable with, I will back away. And I need to battle it now.

0:35:55
When you first joined the catalyst, you were like, we just you’re you’re gone. I’m like, okay. Bye bye. And then but now, you’re like, No. Not today. And I love that. Right? Because I can see it. Like, that’s the perfect thing. Because it’s just like, that’s okay. You had too much caffeine. You didn’t sleep well, then or you’re still processing something you learned yesterday. And the next thing isn’t ready to click it, and that’s okay. Yes. Yeah. And it’s the same no matter when you’re working with people. Right?

0:36:27
When I’m training people, when I’m working with with students and clients or out of fire walk, you know, I’ll I’ll repeat myself. Yeah. I repeat myself and repeat myself and repeat myself. And you know, I’ve had students who’ve worked with me for four, five, six years. And I’ll say something that I’ve said a hundred times, and you can see them. Like, I literally watch people go. I wish that you had said that earlier. I’ve said it a hundred times. I’ve said it every time we’ve broken. I repeat it and repeat it and repeat it.

0:37:05
And sometimes we just cannot like, some part of us outright rejects the message. Not ready for that message. Yeah. Not ready for that message. Yeah. And we don’t have to worry, but, like, I love that you do this now because other people have said, you know, I saw Corina doing such and such the other day, and I was like, uh-huh.

0:37:26
They’re like, I realized that I you say something to me. And if I don’t wanna hear it, I get mad at you. And then I I realized that wasn’t it because when Corinne was like, no, not today, can we say something that they’re like, well, I’m done today or something. You’re like, that’s my cue. I’m done today. Goodbye, everybody. And you and then that you doing that was the trigger for the other person to go, oh, I sit there and I get mad at you and I get mad at you. When I really should just be like not today, and then I come back the next day. I’m like, yeah. Now, today. Yeah. Tuesday, I made you mad because I’m like, you this is something you gotta do. Otherwise, you’re gonna be in pain later on. I can see all of the all of the pain that is before you. If we just put in this one automation right now, we’re gonna get mad at me. Go ahead. I don’t care.

0:38:12
In your view, he says, like, be mad. When when you’re giving me a list of, like, like, a whole bureau board full of like, assignments. I’m like, okay. And then I leave. Right? Because I put my homework again. I have four. That’s okay. It’s okay that I have homework and it’s okay that I took two two days off and didn’t do that homework. But it’s up here. Right? Yeah. And then if you’re like, I hated this homework, but this was good. This was good. I like this homework. I’m like, okay, good. And that helps me.

0:38:40
That’s an ongoing conversation because I can see what you like doing and what you don’t like doing. So that helps me also build other tools for you, like, not just, like, you know, like, not just the the processes in your business, but, like, I can see you, like, okay. You’re gonna need support here. You’re gonna need support. That’s for me to to observe, to help observe. Because you’re in the moment And you’re you’re just trying to get through this thing. I get to, like, walk around. You notice the firewalks. I and the mentorships that you do. You get to walk around in this, like, three sixty and say, okay. Mhmm. Yeah. Okay. This we can make this even better. We can make this even better. And that’s that’s how we nourish each other. Right. Like, we’re not How do I get this person to hear the thing that everybody else in the room has heard. Yeah. We’re not trying to teach in a way that it’s like, no, you’ve gotta do it this way. It’s It’s helping you shape that that three sixty view of yourself. Yes. And helping make it even better. Right. In finding the language that you can hear. Right? Yep. Or the senses that you need because it’s not always hearing, it’s not always being. It’s not always sometimes it’s feeling.

0:39:50
The other day, I asked somebody what their brand smells like, and they were like, wait. Right. And from there, we were able to craft a whole brand around it. Colors, imagery — Right. — but it wasn’t until it’s Oh, wait. Actually, it’s like vanilla and cloves and cinnamon. I’m like, we can build that. That’s a brand. Yes. Yep. Yeah. So it’s like being there with people to kind of say, okay. It’s okay if this one way didn’t work. We’ve got like twelve hundred more. It’s fine. We’ll work through it. We’ll get there together. Right. And the ideas will keep coming.

0:40:29
I mean, that’s part of being, you know, I don’t know if it’s being an entrepreneur, but I feel like for me being in the rooms up on the at the catalyst, is like, oh, I’ve like, these people, their brains work like mine. Right? They’re not saying, oh, that’ll never work or oh, here she goes again with another one of her big ideas. Right? And I have lots of big ideas. Right? Yeah. What I haven’t had was the right help or the ability to ask the right people for help. And at one point in my life, the ability to ask for help at all. Right. So let’s talk about that.

0:41:12
Are you nourished right now as a risk taker? I think that I’m nourished in the catalyst. Okay? I think that there are relationships in my life where I’m being nourished for the the risks that I’m taking being shout shout out to misha at spill the tea, Apothecary, who’s another entrepreneur. Right? So she could see it. Right? It’s like something that happens and I said, we’re like, oh, I know what that is. I wanna I wanna be a part of that. In whatever way that I can or help that alone, whatever way I can.

0:41:55
I think that my life is such right now. Where I know how to nourish me. And I don’t have a lot of demands that would take me away from what I really want to be focusing on right now. And so I know how to nourish myself and have set up my life in a way that allows me to work on my business. Right. Awesome. Yeah. And to fill my own well so that when the clients come because they’re coming, they’re getting ready. Right? That my well is is full so that I’m not trying to, you know, give you the last drop of energy that I have — Yeah. — which we can do. You know, we can over we can also over I don’t know if we can overnourish people, but we can certainly deplete ourselves trying. Right? So that I think that there’s a balance there. Mhmm.

0:43:02
And how are you on receiving nourishment? Is it easy for you? Sometimes, sometimes, sometimes not, sometimes I’m a little shy about it. Yeah. I think I’m not accustomed to it. Right? I wasn’t nourished well. As a child. Yeah. And because of that, I that I was in relationships as an adult that were not nourishing. Right? Yeah. Yeah. And so when nourishment is offered, I think my first response is to be surprised. Right? To be surprised. To be delighted, right, to be grateful.

0:43:56
I think that there have certainly been moments when I’ve, like, spent, like, a whole day with you working on my business and then, like, I kinda monopolized the room today. You know. And but then I hear you say, you know, that’s what I’m here for. That’s what we’re doing. That’s what you needed. That’s what their space core. Yeah. And so that’s been really helpful to me to be able to ask for what I need and to receive it and to And to also hear, nope, I’m working on this or to read the room and be like, they are really busy building out the Catalyst website right now. And my thing can wait today. Oh, really? The only thing that we and I will say this, we we work on things, but, like, anything that we work on during those moderated co working are things that we can stop very easily. I know. Because it’s it’s yeah.

0:44:49
But I I loved when I was like, can I just build you a website, please? And I was like, I don’t know. I don’t know what’s I done so that we can go on through the fun things. That was my that was me asking for nourishment. That this is the this is what some people don’t realize is that when I’m like, hi, may I please just build you a brand and a website that you love and we can move on It’s because I love that part. I well, or that I’m just, like, tight I’m just, like, I don’t the the thinking about hiring a web designer or, like, what you’re brat. It kinda gets boring for me. I’m just like, there’s so many fun things we can do. Like, we can get you on media. We can start doing, you know, your podcast because I wanna do all that fun stuff. Can I just do this so that we can move on and get to the fun things? And people were like, wait. You wanna do more yes. I would like to do this work today and so that you can move on and we can have more fun.

0:45:44
This energy brought you the idea for the Crone herself. Seriously, we were in the room for about two hours discussing it. And Marissa at some point says here, let me share my screen with you. And there’s a whole brand. There’s a there’s a like, there’s a whole brand built. There’s, like, here are your social media posts and here’s your social media — Here’s your website. Here’s your podcast cover. Here’s your logo. Here’s your podcast cover. Here’s your book cover. And I’m like, wait. I’m doing a podcast. Wait, I’m writing a book. Wait, what what is happening? But it was it was this explosion of big crone energy, and that’s what it looks like. It looks like an explosion. I think it is the big bang. Right? The explosion of all creative energy. Right? It has a little nebula and the stars are in there.

0:46:43
But this happened in two hours — Yeah. — meanwhile, for the past, I don’t know, twelve weeks, I’ve been fighting with You know, can you please use the color I asked you to use on my website? Yeah. Yeah. Whereas, I was like, what color are you thinking of this? And you’re like, that hot pink color that I put on the website that got taken away from me by another web designer. I was like, done. I was like, I can color match that. And then everything just sort of fell in place. But the reason why I did that one, I was like, I was co creating with you.

0:47:15
And this this sometimes happens, like, where people will they’re they’re telling me a story, and I’m writing their landing page. And then at the end, I’m just like, oh, and here’s your Here you go, here’s your brand, or here’s your landing page. I mean, we’re like, wait, what? When did you do this? I’m like, while you were telling me the story, I was pulling out the juicy bits. Right. Right? So — Right. — you didn’t have so because what happens is in the in the creation process is we get this idea, we get really excited, and then we go to put it down and it’s like, oh, And we overthink it — Right. — and we have, like, executive dysfunction, and we’re just like, and then it never goes out. Right? With me, I’m just like, okay.

0:47:53
While Korea’s talking about this, I’m gonna make this visual. I’m gonna put some words in. I’m gonna start pulling out some of these these phrases that that she’s written down here, and I’m gonna start putting it in, and then it felt real. Right? Yeah. You know, and then you’re like, I don’t want to do a website. I was like, I’m just gonna build up for you tomorrow. And you’re like, no, you can. Like, I actually can. Do. Here we go. I was, like, give me your passwords and your logins. Like, we’re you know, about anything like what? Yeah. Okay? Yeah. Yeah. You couldn’t think yourself out of having that great idea. No. And and because of the way my mind works, right? I have a hundred great ideas every day. Right? But this was really really big.

0:48:42
And I thought if I don’t move on this very, very quickly. I will get bored or I will get distracted by the next thing, or I’ll get mad at the project, or something will happen, and it will fall it will fall away. And then I’ll be back in this position again of, like, what am I doing? What am I doing? What am I doing? Yeah. And I mean, I have this thing where I look, I can’t show up for somebody’s business more than they can show up.

0:49:14
That’s the whole part of the done with you. It’s like you come in the room and you’re like, I’m gonna work on my website today. I’m like, let me just log in because I know that you’re ready and there to work. Right? Mhmm. Part of that done, like, done for you, I can’t do that anymore. Because I will sit there and work on it, and then I gotta wait for you to to, like, look at it. Like, it is so much better where we’re just like, you wanna build this home pit. You’re like, I wanna work on my podcast page. I’m like, okay. Here, can you give me this okay. And then, you know, I’m like, give me your login and you’re you’re still talking about it. And I’m like, okay. There’s your podcast page. Okay.

0:49:47
He’s like, how have a good day. You know, and you now, again, don’t have to talk yourself out of it. Right? And go, oh, I don’t know what the tech is or I don’t know how to do this the easiest way. I’m like, I got you. Like, I got you. We’ll just we’ll just put it in. And there you go. Now you get to go b u. You get to go the Crone herself because you don’t have to be the expert. I mean, you you will become the expert. You’re like, I will know this and I will figure it out before you give it to someone else. And I I know that about you. Why? Your your true magic is being the Crone herself.

0:50:21
Is going out there and and impacting people with your energy. Right? Yes. I need to get away get all those obstacles away so that you just get to show up and shine. You just get to go out and talk about these amazing things. Your whole life meet go meet your whole life. Mhmm. Right? Don’t wait. Don’t don’t waste the prone energy.

0:50:45
Like, I know all these key messages because we say them all the time. Yes. And, like, you’re not you’re not too young. You’re never too young. You’re not too young. You’re not too old. You’re just right. Doesn’t matter when you step into that big sentence. Energy here. Nobody you don’t we have it our whole lives. So big the Crone herself wants you to know you can access big crone energy if you’re twenty five or thirty or thirty five or forty or eighty five or one hundred. Yes. Right. And it’s cross cultural. It’s intergenerational. We are it’s about sharing information. It’s about connecting. It’s about it’s actually about nourishing the risk takers too, and I love that.

0:51:31
It is it is a it is a movement. Oh, yeah. Then I was like, oh, and then you have a movement. You’re like, I have a movement now. I’m like, it’s bigger than you. I’m sorry. Yeah. Please go forth. Yes. It is bigger than me. You know? Yep. It is bigger than me. And there are pieces of that movement out there. Right?

0:51:47
Since I’ve started doing this work that have sort of landed or people send me links or whatever. I’m like, oh, good. This is this thing is already rolling. And I would it it’s already here. Right? Like, it’s not mine. Right? Yeah. I mean, the Crone herself, that’s mine. That’s — Yeah. — my name. That’s my name.

0:52:12
And their own energy is my thing. But this is archetypal. Right? This is ancient. This is the ancestral. Yeah. And so we and we’re here. Sort of, like, bringing it in and through bringing it in and through bringing it in and through.

0:52:35
So A lot of my teachings, yes, they’re from my whole life. Right? Of teaching, of mentoring, of guiding, of loving, of nurturing, of helping people develop into people who can get up in the morning and be like, I’m good. Right? There’s that piece of it, but there’s also this other stuff that is way bigger than any one individual. And I don’t remember who said the line, but they said, you know, one day it might be that a bunch of old women start a rebellion and take over the world. Right? And in other cultures, old women are in charge. Right? When the old women speak, everybody stops whatever they’re doing to listen and offers them that respect because they have wisdom, because we’re because we’re crumbs. Right?

0:53:48
There’s also something here about sovereignty that I wanna say. And when I think that what people are talking about when they say the word sovereign, does that mean I’m self authoritative? Right? Like, I’m in charge of me. And that’s that’s good. That’s good progress from everybody else is in charge of me, and I’m taking direction from everyone else.

0:54:16
The thing is is that sovereignty has to be in solidarity. It has to be collaborative. It has to be collective, cooperative, conspiratorial even. Right? That If all I’m concerned about is me and my needs, that And that means I’m not I don’t care about you in your needs because I’m sovereign. Right?

0:54:46
And we’ve all seen this use this way. Right? Like, I get to do whatever I want because I’m a sovereign being. No. You do not. Get to do. Whatever you want that is harmful or deleterious to other people or communities because you’re a sovereign being. Now you’re using sovereign the way that it was meant to be used, which is the ruler. Over the people, over their subjects. So we’re not subjects. We get to The goal here is for us all to become sovereign, self authoritative.

0:55:26
Right? Within the agreed upon culture with others. We don’t get to just be like, I get to do whatever I want. You know, people who pick up AR-15s are going to do whatever they want. Right? People who are ruining communities or ruining good people’s reputations are doing whatever they want. We have to figure out how do we all walk hand in hand together toward the world that we wanna live in, not just our little world.

0:56:06
So that’s my tirade on sovereignty. I think it’s a great idea, but we have to do it together and support one another in that. Did we reach our limit? I just realized that I had wrote big cone energy instead of big cone energy. So now we’re at yeah. We’re back to big cone energy. It’s just that’s it. So you have I just wanna wrap things up here. You have a podcast, you have a movement. They can find all of that at the Crone herself dot com. Yes. And we will have links for that.

0:56:45
But one thing I I’ve been doing is I just wanna take a moment to recognize and appreciate you. I love that you’ve joined the catalyst. I absolutely am just overjoyed. Like I said, I I I’m loving the journey that you’re bringing the other catalyst members along in their own self reflection and self co like, their self creation of themselves in the in the world. And you I mean, you’re fascinating. I enjoy every time you come in to the room with their stories. I love how you talk about, you know, the way that you show up for other people. But you are you’re in a credible knowledge keeper. You’re an incredible storyteller, and you really do have so much patience and so much love that you’re giving into the world that sometimes I’m just like I gotta take a moment and mute myself because I’m just like, wow. Corinne is a big deal. And it is such an honor to have you in that space and to be a part of that cocreation that we’re creating in the world. I I can’t like I said, I cannot I cannot shower enough words of appreciation upon you. So thank you so much for being there in the room. We’re gonna we’re gonna also talk about being in the room on another podcast, but I just I really appreciate you there. So thank you so much. And thank you for what you’re doing in the world.

0:58:09
Like, I I got excited by this because I’m, like, I’m ready for this. I’m ready for more intergenerational learning. I’m I’m ready for and it’s an exchange. Right? It’s not just like it’s as you said, the Crone big Crone’s at any time of our lives, you know, you give to me we’re not that much of a age difference, but you give to me, I give to you, you know, I think we have, like, a decade and twelve, fourteen years maybe between us. But, like, we are given that’s a it’s a reciprocal learning that’s happening on both sides of it. And I think that is a relationship. That’s that’s relationship goals. Right? That’s that is friendship and call league and co creator, collaborator, conspirator — Yes. — that’s it. Right?

0:58:53
Is when you move that person’s got and you’re gonna Sometimes that person’s gonna annoy you and sometimes that person’s gonna be like, jeez, why did she say that? And it’s like, oh, why did she put that why did she put that Facebook real up about me? It’s not all about it’s not always about you. Yeah. It wasn’t about me. Main character energy. I have to do a thing that’s like this I think I’ve done it before, but it’s like, the take on that you think this real is about you? Don’t you. Don’t you? You know, it’s it’s — It was such an important moment in our relationship though.

0:59:33
Right? Yeah. Now I was able to, like, bring you that deep insecurity. Yeah. And you were able to just be like, that wasn’t what was happening, but why do you think it was? Yeah. And I knew why I thought it was. Yeah. But that that was the moment when I was, like, okay, either they’re gonna be, like, yeah, I was laughing at you because you’re an asshole. Or I wasn’t. And — Yeah. — and we and we can still be friends even after you thought that I did that. To you. Yeah.

1:00:08
And I was horrified. I was, like, horrified that you would be hurt by something. And I was, like, wait. No. That’s, like, five people that’s happening to you right now. It doesn’t mean it’s totally it’s always about us. Right? Yeah.

1:00:18
And I think I said to you, like, it’s actually a reflection of how I show up in that moment. Right? So it’s, like, my own, like, I’m always I’m always like, I’m slightly sarcastic. I’m like, oh, yeah. Right? And I joke a lot, but I’m always trying to, like, measure my own reactions against other people so that I can be a really good mirror and so that I can be a really good community member. So I was horrified because your response was perfect, though. And it would yeah.

1:00:45
But I also knew that I’m, like, I’ve been there several times a week. If you were, like, what’s that about me? I’m, like, no, but should it be? And, like, you know, at that point, we we get rid of the shame. Right? We get rid of that, like because it’s, like, Yeah. We’re all like that. I look at myself in my own. I do a real or I do a TikTok. And I’m like, I was talking to myself there. And people, you know, people were like, about me and like, oh, no. I’m literally doing a little self journaling here in this process. Right? And that and that’s the thing is we just take take away that kind of shame moment. And we’re just like, oh, we do ridiculous things all the time. And we it’s okay. No one died. You know? No one was irrevocably harmed. No. Died. No.

1:01:31
And in a space like you’ve created, we all get to, like, look at that stuff about ourselves and be like, oh, look, we’re all doing it. Oh, look, you’re crying in the room today. Oh, I’m crying in the room today. Or, like, oh, you’ve got a pretty long today? Yeah. Well, you can’t focus today. You’re just gonna sit and, like, stare at the wall and listen to us, chat. Cool, welcome.

1:01:54
You know, like, nobody has to be super productive, nobody has to be, you know, killing it every day. But we all show up for whatever it is. It’s just showing up and it’s being there and being nourished by just being around other people so that we’re not sitting there in our dark basements like I used like my potato my potato era, you know, where I was just in a dark basement wondering when is this all gonna change? No. We we come in and we sit in those rooms with the grass with the green walls and the people chatting around us. Sometimes we’re on it. We’re like, wow. It’s really super productive. And that’s cool.

1:02:29
We celebrate that too. Even when we were that person. And I think that’s the biggest thing that we can do for other people is know that we’re not all on the same journey, we’re not all on the same path, Right. We still get to celebrate the heck out of each other, even when we feel like we have nothing to celebrate, and it changes things. Like, it changes the way we build relationships because it doesn’t have to be transactional or competitive we’re competitive. Right.

1:02:57
Sometimes, we also have some good competitions, though, where it’s like an I dare you to get to the and we’ve we’re we’re gonna bring some more of those, but they’re friendly. They’re absolutely friendly, and they’re are fun. Right? Because it’s just fun games where we’re just like, I can get more reels or I can get more likes than you or whatever. Like, it’s just those things where we shake it up. Again, it’s making things ridiculous that normally would stress about. Right. Right. You know, we’re gonna pull on the nineteen seventies gym shorts with the slits up the side and we’re gonna go run for our social media goals or something, you know, just like Yeah. You know? Yeah. But everybody gets a participation ribbon even if you didn’t get to the finish line. We are like that here. Yeah. Yeah. It’s good. Yeah. It’s good stuff.

1:03:44
Thank you so much. Such decision. I I yes. And I’m so glad you made that decision. I’m so glad you came in. So yes. So everybody, please do go see Karina Blackheart. At the Crone herself dot com. If you’re looking for her podcast, it is big crone energy and it is anywhere you would listen to a podcast, Apple, Spotify, you name it, you wanna listen to it, go look up big Crown Energy, the episodes are fantastic. Mhmm. And I am looking forward to seeing so much more hot pink smoke and and Nebulized mezz rising across my social media feed and in the news and beyond. So thank you again very much, Karina, for being here. I appreciate you. Thank you so much. Bye.